cutesy ->

I still can't believe the little pest is a year old already. Eek!

I'm not sure what the point of this face is...

or the pants on the head lol. Little toad.

oops... lovey crap

I forgot to mention earlier, in the previous blog, about my vow problems (thats v-o-w not b-o-w-e-l btw).

I had written a first draft ages ago, and left it stored on my pc. So... turns out I completely forgot to print it out and take it with me when I packed and left the house, heading out for my 24 hours of fun friend stuff/avoid husband to be stuff. So I figured, what the heck, no big deal, I'll just write new vows. Shouldn't be that hard huh?

Cept I never did. I couldn't decide what to say and I was either hanging with friends or too tired or sleeping or whatever to sit down and try to write something. Turns out it WAS too hard lol.

So 4pm comes around - half an hour to go till the big W - and I still have no idea what to say. I, like, have no vows! I'm fully stressing out. We leave the hotel... and I'm asking everyone around me for some vow advice... eek! We get to the Point and there's everyone waiting... AND STILL I HAVE NO FRICKIN VOWS!

I said a quick hello to everyone, including Luke lol... and then immediately said to the pastor marrying us, "shit Jason I have no vows". I think he actually breathed a sigh of relief lol. Turns out he was really worried about what non-traditional stuff Luke and I might say. LOL. So he just added to the baptist vows we already "had" to say. Talk about a PHEW moment!

Anyhoo, Luke's first vow draft is actually left as a comment (sorta) on the previous previous blog lol. Yep, two previous's. He also did a speech that included what he wanted to say in his vows after the wedding dinner... so I figure wtf. Might as well blog what should have been my vows lol. So here it is:


Luke… I love you with everything I have to give. You are my love, my life, my world, and I thank you for being by my side as we raise our family.

I might occasionally use words like man-boy or geek-boy to describe you, but truth is that without you I would be lost. When you hold me, it’s as if the world stops and time ceases to be. I’ll be stressing out about something and you’ll just walk up and hug me, and suddenly everything is ok. You are the yin to my yang so to speak, and I feel so very blessed to be given the opportunity to share my life with you.

So.. on to the formal bit… I take you, Luke Cross, to be my friend, my lover, my husband. To live with you, and laugh with you. To stand by your side, and sleep in your arms. I give you my hand, I give you my love, and I give you myself.


And btw... you give it back Luke... and by "it" I mean my hand/love/self... and I breaka your legs. And breaking your legs includes slicing off your manhood. Just so you know. No threats or anything (man I don't know why the pastor was so worried about what I might say lol)...

its a love/hate thing

Wow what a weekend. I wish some parts went slower and other parts faster lol.

Here's the rundown:

• Friday -
  Yay, time with my best buds who I don't get to see much. Cept Looloo, I see her a lot lol. Hung out, got nails done, chatted about inane stuff, chatted about important stuff, had a few drinks, ate great food... and consequently went to bed way too late. Enjoyed it though.


• Saturday -
  Soooo hard to get out of bed in the morning. I actually thought about postponing the wedding for 24 hours so I could catch up on sleep lol. Not seriously... but, well, you know. I was tired and wanted to lie in bed all day. One of those "wish time would stop for a while" moments. Noah, on the other hand, was wide awake and crawling all over me from sunrise onwards. Grr.
  Conscripted the Mothman to go do jobs for me by loaning him my car - phew. Cos I didn't have enough hours in the day to do everything lol. Thanks!
  Pick up kids, pick up cake, get hair done etc, all that "mutton dressed as lamb" wedding stuff... man I looked like a clown. :S
  Pick up more kids, drop off cake, and its back to the hotel to prepare food, set up the balcony, ice the drinks... oh and actually get dressed.
  Noah, of course, decided he needed feeding at precisely the time I needed to leave for the wedding, so, yup, I was late. Oops.


• The wedding ceremony -
  Beautiful time of day, sunset. At the top of the boardwalk, the point, on a cliff, overlooking the beach... blah blah. I was sooo very nervous. I can't even put the level of my nerves into words. I was all eeky lol.
  Check out some of the pics below. But ignore my fetal gut. Why oh why do all the photos we've seen so far ALL contain my giant stomach! Whats with that! I hate photos at the best of time cos I always look stupid in them. I'm either smiling too much or not enough, or maybe I blinked just as the camera went off, or maybe... meh, trust me, I hate photos. I look stupid in 2D. Point is - I'm all *shudders* in every damn wedding photo. What is wrong with you people! Sigh. I am never (I repeat, never!) allowing photos of me to be taken ever, EVER again.

• The fun wedding bits -
  We all went back to the hotel balcony (hhuuuugeee balcony!) for drinks and nibblies and stuff. In fact we were there so long that I had to ring the surf club and tell them we were going to be 40 mins late for the dinner lol.
  But, meh, there were drinks and chats to be had! (and omg you should have seen the mess in the morning!)
  Then it was off to the Surf Club for dinner and a speech or two and the *drools* yummy cake. And of course... more chatting, more drinking, a dance or two... heck, even some pokie playing by the drunkards amongst us.
  
• Retrospectively -
  I think most people appreciated the relaxed atmosphere of the ceremony and the celebrations afterwards... altho I know some family members weren't impressed lol. I felt most sorry for my grandparents, who really shouldnt have had to walk all over the place or wait so long for their dinner etc. But I did try to look after them.
  A couple of my close friends sat at the kids tables too, so it was hard for them to mingle etc. I don't think they enjoyed themselves much either. :(
  But, yeah, I hope most people thought it was a nice wedding. We wanted it be relaxed and easy going - no traditional pompous crap. I hate crap lol. I just hope it didn't come just across as totally unorganised, eek.
  Food was great (thanks to Looloo and her mum and Kate - you guys are legends!), there were heaps of drinks to be had (woot!). What more could one ask for lol?
  Luke's asked me not to bitch, but I dunno, can't help it. A heap of family members left early, part way through the pre-dinner celebrations at the hotel... thats before we even got to the surf club lol. Makes me feel sad for Luke as well as personally offended. I don't get that - some people just have different priorities I guess. Family first doesn't always apply (oh I just realised thats a Dr Phil quote lol - how sad!)
  
• All in all... and I'm not really bitching, I'm just reflecting on the good and the bad...
  It was a no-stress, relaxed celebration with our closest friends and family. I had a good time (even tho Noah was painful here and there), Luke had a good time... and I hope most people enjoyed themselves. We really appreciate the efforts made by everyone to come and spend this time with us, especially those who travelled long distances. We had guests fly and drive to the coast from as far away as Sydney and Mackay and, eek, even Central Qld!!
  
• Today -
  Its weird but I'm having a sad day today. Keep thinking about things that happened over the weekend, things that were said, the things I should have said and didn't... I keep replaying stuff over in my head, like its a movie and I'm re-watching my favourite scenes lol. Heck, in some scenes I'm even the director lol, changing things, doing things differently. I think they call that daydreaming lol.
  I think I'm most sad that the weekends over, and that we're home already, back to normal life. Sigh.

Like I said before... wow what a weekend.

sigh

Tired. Really tired. But brain won't turn off. So many things to do. I shouldn't have turned my computer on lol.

I need to write a list, maybe I'll feel more "in control" if I have a silly handwritten piece of paper which I can carry with me everywhere during the next few days. So I don't forget anything. Or miss anything. Or forget to miss anything. Or whatever.

An itinerary. Thats what I need. Yes. Will do that now. Then back to bed.

Short sentences. Somewhat intriguing. Weird, unusual... but mainly just weird.

Now wheres the damn normal paper and pen instead of this monitor and keyboard business?

ramble ramble ramble... don't think, don't edit... just ramble

So I've been slightly busy in the last week or so. Things to do, places to go, people to see.

Noah had his first birthday this week, which was fun. Hard to believe the little pest is a year old already. On the one hand it seems like only yesterday I was pregnant, yet on the other hand I can't remember life without him... or more specifically, a life without sleep deprivation.

I vaguely recall going to bed whenever you felt like it and sleeping till you woke up. I vaguely recall lying in bed and watching movies all weekend when its pouring rain. I vaguely recall trips to the cinema, and going out for dinner without a stressful "omg lets just go home" ordeal. I vaguely recall nights out to play sport with the girlies, or heck, just nights out with friends in general. I vaguely recall daytime cappucinos and lattes and relaxing shopping expeditions at the plaza. I vaguely recall the ability to be impulsive lol.

I mean, I still do some of these things... but with a little whingey tagalong in his pram with his nappy bag and spare clothes and all that official baby crap. Sigh.

He loved his Thomas trains, and his Thomas cake. OMG did he love the cake lol. He seems to love anything with wheels, and Thomas the Tank Engine in particular - I guess its cos Thomas has that stupid big train face lol. Noah also - unfortunately - likes the Wiggles. I think we should invest in more than 1 dvd tho cos I'm sick to GRRR of the same music and sound effects and dialogue over and over and over and over again. Damn the Wiggles! Damn them I say!

Actually, the little pest goes to his first ever day at day care tomorrow... eek. It'll only be for a couple of hours, and I don't feel bad or guilty lol. Thursday's my doctor/hospital day so it means I don't have to put him in and out the car and drag him around to all the damn doctors. So thats cool. And of course, every 2nd Thursday, when I don't have doc appointments... well, I might try out a few of those vague "latte and shopping" type of memories. Or I might catch up on some sleep lol.

So what else is there? Um...

Still busy with wedding organisational type of stuff. Hope to get the last few things done tomorrow if I'm nice and quick at the hospital.

Speaking of bottleshops (or should I say thinking of bottleshops)... it sux that I can't drink at the wedding. Grr. Going out with the girly friends for dinner soon tho, might indulge in a light beer or something then. Fortunately for everyone else, at least we have a designated driver - ME! Fair not! It's really strange how much I crave things like beer and champagne (I mean, I don't even drink champers!) when I'm pregnant. That sooo can't be a good thing. :P

Hey - question - "girly friends". If a guy is gay is he classified as guy or girl when you're in a group? Cos I'm thinking "girly". Yes he might have a penis, but its like... a fake one. He's not actually a guy guy. He might as well be a girl... know what I mean? Point is, I am happy to have gay guys tag along on girly nights cos, well... they're big girls. =D

Ironically, I also classify lezbo girls as girls, lol. I guess I define "girly friends" as:

• girls... of course... regardless of dykedom vs heterodom (us XX chromosome's have to stick together after all!)
• gay guys... basically any non-threatening, non-male-y guy I guess (cept how often do you ever seen a non-maley straight guy lol - they might "pretend" to be all snaggy but we know the truth!)

So, basically, a girly friend is any friend who isn't a male-y hetero guy. Hmm. It's sort of an exclusionary definition I guess. Also excludes all variation of husband, boyfriend, partner. Gay boyfriends yes, real husbands no... lol'ing at Disso (yeah yeah, private joke).

So where was I before I got sidetracked? Um... yeah... alcohol. *dreams*

fyi - the 4 most dangerous questions a woman can ask a man...

1. "What are you thinking, darling?"
2. "Do you love me?"
3. "Does my bum look big in this?"
4. "Do you think she's prettier than me?"

What makes these questions so very lethal is that almost every man gives the wrong answer, leading to a major argument at best, or divorce and murder at worst!

For example:

1. "What are you thinking, darling?"
The correct answer to this question, is, of course: "I'm sorry if I've been a little pre-occupied, my angel. To tell the truth, (as if the bastard ever would!) I was just reflecting on what a warm, caring, thoughtful, funny, intelligent, sexy and stunningly beautiful woman you are and what a jolly fortunate chap I am to have you."
Obviously, this statement bears no resemblance whatsoever to what the tosser was really thinking about at the time, which was most likely one of the following:
a. Football
b. sex (but not with you).
c. How big your arse looks in that dress.
d. how much prettier the woman next door is than you.

2. "Do you love me?"
The correct answer to this question is, "Yes." For those who want to make sure the good woman gets the message it's best to be a little more effusive by replying: "Yes, my angel. You know I think the world of you."
Wrong answers include:
a. "Mmm?"
b. "Would it make you feel better if I said yes?"
c. "That depends on what you mean by 'love." (Prepare to die...)
d. "Does it matter, darling? It's only a word after all." (This one will probably result in you sustaining serious injuries to the fleshier parts of your anatomy).

3. "Does my bum look big in this?"
This is probably the most difficult question of all. Whilst the correct answer is undoubtedly to confidently and quickly affirm: "No, of course not! You look simply stunning, my angel!" and then beat a hasty retreat, many men make the mistake of hesitating before answering. This is invariably fatal as a woman will pounce on the slightest delay and subject you to a full hour's rigorous interrogation during which she will try on twenty different dresses in the hope of catching you out. Inevitably you will break under the pressure and make the mistake of admitting "you look good in anything, darling." After that, you're lost.
Wrong answers include:
a. "I wouldn't say so, but perhaps the blue one would suit you better..." (Oh shit...!)
b. "Compared to what?" (Almost as bad an answer as [a])
c. "I like a little meat on my women." (Prepare to have you bunny well and truly boiled)
d. "I've seen bigger ones." (this is the clever answer. Or so men think. If you use it, you're dead meat.)

4. "Do you think she's prettier than me?"
The 'she' in question could be an ex-girlfriend, a cute-arsed teenager you were staring at so hard that you almost drove under a bus, a page three slapper or the girl next door. In every case, the correct answer always is, "What - that fat ugly old slapper? No, you're much prettier, darling."
Wrong answers include:
a. "Not prettier, just pretty in a different way.." (You might get away with this with some women... the dumb women).
b. "Beauty's in the eye of the beholder, don't you think?" (Nope. Not when she's asking, it isn't, chummy. You're dead meat!)
c. "Yes, but you have a much better personality." (Oh shit...)
d. "Only because she's a bit younger and thinner than you." (Prepare to die...slowly and painfully).

Courtesy of Men: don't answer her!

someecards.com for the perfect message

Love...

Get well soon...

Encouragement...

Happy birthday...

Friendship...